At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
We are two peas in an std pod
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize