Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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