I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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