I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
