Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Randomize
