If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize