I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
