The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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