Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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