in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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