I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Randomize