Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
