It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
