YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
