is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
We're too hungover to prance.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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