Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
