Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize