Sponge bath it is.
kristin has been a bad kristin
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
