yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
