If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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