Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
