just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
