This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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