so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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