This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize