Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
