Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
How's work?
Spinning.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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