Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
