Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
