You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
