I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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