Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
