there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
