Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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