Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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