I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
