What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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