one two three fourrrrnication!
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
