I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
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