Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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