I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
