Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
