So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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