Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
