she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We had sex on a dog bed..
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
