So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
