Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
