Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize