i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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