Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
