I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
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