you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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