There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
